February 4 , 2007: Fifth Sunday After Epiphany

If any of us are ever contestants on the TV game show Jeopardy, chose the category Religion, and see the answer: “trembling fear and unworthiness.” You will know from today's scripture readings that the question is: “What is the natural human response to being called by God?”

The prophet Isaiah has a vision of the most Holy Lord sitting high and lofty on a throne with fiery winged creatures in attendance, and just the hem of the Lord's robe fills the temple. “Woe is me. ” Cries Isaiah.

In Paul's letter to the church in Corinth he refers to his experience of seeing the risen Jesus and himself as untimely born—not fit to be called an apostle. Peter's response in today's gospel lesson—kneeling before Jesus and exclaiming “Go away from me Lord, for I am a sinful man.” Captures it all.

Fear, unworthiness, disbelief—natural human responses to being called by God. Natural because God's holiness is breaking into our ordinary lives and routines.

Today's scripture readings show us that in stories about individuals being called by God, there is a consistent five step process. And knowing what this five step pattern is, ought to help us recognize in our own lives when it may actually be God calling us to some particular work. Whether that work is as momentous as changing careers, developing new relationships, trying a new ministry, or as brief as a short term project or just making a phone call.

After all, who of us wants to be like the farmer out his fields one day, and in the distant horizon the farmer sees clouds forming the letters P and C. The farmer takes this as a sign God is communicating something important to him. “PC?? PC?? What is it God is trying to tell me? PC? PC? Preach Christ? Yes, God is calling me to quit being a farmer, and preach Christ! So the farmer left his field to follow God's calling to preach Christ, much like in today's gospel story Peter James and John leave that boatload of fish. Only problem was the farmer was a lousy speaker, what he said didn't resonate with the few folks who he could gather around him. While his faith was strong, his gifts and talents were limited for this vocation. But still he kept at it. How could he deny the clear heavenly sign to preach Christ? We are called to be faithful, right? Not successful. But still after months of hard work he was discouraged. He confided to a friend, “I'm doing the best that I'm able—why isn't God helping me more in this? Why aren't folks responding to my preaching?” And his friend said, “Well, maybe the sign God gave you in the heavens was to not to preach Christ, but to plant corn.”

So here's the five step pattern scripture shows us when a person is called by God:

You are going about your daily routine and tasks when something out of the ordinary happens. Isaiah was fulfilling his duty in the temple when he had his vision. Peter is washing his nets after a fruitless night of fishing. Paul's on his way to arrest Christians when a blinding light knocks him off his horse. When Moses saw the burning bush, he was tending his father-in-law's sheep. Most likely God's call to us won't be as dramatic as burning bushes, frightening visions, blinding lights or nets full of fish—may just be a still small voice inside your head, or the off comment of a coworker or friend, that makes you go, Huh? What?” Or, God may call you through seeing or hearing something you've seen or heard a zillion times before, but now something allows you to see or hear it in a different and surprising way. Whatever the event is, it grabs your attention, you can't help but notice.
Your first reaction is to disbelieve or discount it. A call from God may not be logical, maybe doesn't make a lot of sense given what's going on in your life right now—fit what your commitments or priorities are—maybe it doesn't jive with you know to be “true.” If Peter were a betting man, what kind of bet do you think he would have placed that his fishing nets would be filled to the breaking point? But if we are open to at least entertaining the idea that this event is something to pay attention to, that is the beginning of wisdom, and responding to God's call. It is an honest response, I believe, to have some skepticism, because the surer we are about something, the greater the margin for error.
So we protest a bit, or at least ask for clarification. In our Christmas reading service last December we heard Mary asked the angel Gabriel, “How can this be?” “How will I know?” Zachariah responds to the news his wife Elizabeth will become pregnant. Peter says, “I've fished all night and caught nothing and you want me to try again?” Moses says, “Who am I that I should go Pharaoh?”
God gives some reassurance. Granted not as much as we often wish God would give us, but an answer, some reassurance comes that yes, this is the work I have for you to do. The reassurance may be an event, or the answer to overcoming some roadblock that's in your path. It maybe the words of another that help you put the pieces together. Maybe it's just the courage to yes, make that phone call, or agree to that project—realizing that if you are wrong about hearing God's call, it's not the end of the world, not much has been lost other than some of my pride and time, and we know God honors our sincere and honest efforts to discern what ever it is God is calling us to do.
Is the stepping out in faith, taking the chance. Our saying, “OK God. I trust you. I'm not sure at all where this will all end, but you can count on me.”

Can you recall in your own life, a time when you thought to yourself: “oh God, not me! No way! This can't be right! But lo and behold, you stepped out in faith, mustered your courage, became vulnerable and took a chance? And as you look back now, can you see the hand of God guiding and sustaining you?

There are all kinds of different voices calling each of us to different kinds of work and the trick is to discover whether the thought we have is the voice of God rather than the voice of habit, or culture, the voice of peer pressure, career, the voices of our parents—even when they are long dead, or the voice of self-interest and ego.

a good rule for finding out whether it is God's call we hear is this: the kind of work God usually calls us do is the kind of work (a) that you need most to do and (b) that the world most needs to have done.

Notice Beuchner doesn't say, the kind of work you want to do, or the kind of work you are good at. In my own experience, the kind of work I believe God has called me to was work that for my own wholeness and healing I needed to do. It was work that stretched my comfort zone, work where success was not always apparent. Work where part of my ego was on the line—where I was vulnerable to being rejected or worse, fail. Work where I could not predict the outcome, but when I look back, I see the hand of God guiding and sustaining me and I grew from the experience.

Or said another way, the more broken and hurting, and messed up we are, the more God is bombarding us with calls to follow Jesus that will change our lives. Calling us to actions of work or self-care that we most need to do for our own healing and wholeness. Actions that will transform our lives, and maybe, just maybe, the lives of others.